This is probably the most useful piece of advice my mom ever gave me. Actually, what I remember her saying is more along the lines of “everything washes off your hands” but I’ve simplified it into this concise mantra that I now recite to myself on a daily basis. Dog pooped in its kennel? It washes off. Dog peed on its own legs? “It washes off.” Dog peed in the kennel, on its legs, and on me? “It washes off.” Anal gland juice squirted right over the top of the tub? “Oh, $&*@$!” I mean, “It washes off.”
As a dog groomer I am not permitted to be afraid of filth. I do not have a weak stomach or sensitive hands. I don’t worry about staining my clothes or stinking when I get off of work. In fact, there is great satisfaction in filth. That satisfaction is in the fact that it washes off! How I wish everything in life were so simple.
My boyfriend, like most men, has no qualms about his own stinky socks or filthy bathroom, but give him a tissue and ask him to clean out our poodle’s eye boogies and he visibly retches. Well, that’s not really accurate anymore. He’s grown accustomed to our own dog’s eye boogies and will remove them if I provide six or seven tissues so that, heaven forbid, he doesn’t have to actually TOUCH the eye boogies with his bare hands. But he would never dream of touching a stranger dog’s eye boogies!
Today I groomed a border collie mix that absolutely REAKED of urine, along with various other, less identifiable stenches. It was a “farm dog” who apparently never had a bath, or at least not in the past year, as it was terrified of any touch other than on its head. Which makes sense because no one in his right mind would touch the dog anywhere else on its body with that smell emanating from it. My coworkers gave me looks of pity as I walked the poor beast to my grooming room. I have to hand it to my manager though; he only briefly hesitated when I asked his assistance in lifting the (80 lb) dog into the tub. I guess he also knew that his freshly pressed button-down shirt and tie would wash. You gotta admire that.
Ahhh, so sometimes you listened to what your mother said? Interesting ….
So, grasshoppa, what other things did your sensei teach you?
I think being able to do what you do is most admirable! The idea of cleaning anal gland juice off my sleeve makes me consider just cutting the entire arm off. I wish I was more like you. My gag reflex kicks in just imagining this dog you mentioned. I’m going to have to remember “It washes off.” Great mantra. I must admit, I have gotten better. I can take human hair out of bathroom drains without retching.
Pamajama, thank you for that! You know, as far as human hair in sinks, I think I’d rather touch anything that comes out of a dog than anything that comes off a human. I wonder why that is?
I’ve heard some “country” people say basically the same thing, only using the phrase, “It’ll come out in the wash.”